SHOTGUN!

I am a blond, blue-eyed 19-year-old female. I have advanced degrees in Astrophysics, Bio-Medical Engineering, and Greco-Roman Wrestling. I use my knowledge and fighting skills in Intergalactic Battle.

Unlike the State Farm television advertisement in which the cute girl says “You cannot put anything on the internet that isn’t true” (the one where the girl is waiting on her date—a French model), the internet is full of inappropriate, incorrect, inaccurate information. Just because someone posts a statement that appears credible, does not make it so.

Several months ago many of my Facebook friends either shared or posted a statement(s) similar to those below. These mantras, no matter how you word them, have not truth. The only mantra that grants you any irrevocable rights is calling “SHOTGUN!”, and then only when you are within sight of the vehicle.

In response to the new Facebook guidelines I hereby declare that my copyright is attached to all my personal details, illustrations, paintings, writing, publications, photos, videos, etc. (as a results (sic) of the Berner Convention.)

For commercial use of the above my written consent is needed at all times!

(Anyone reading this can copy this text and paste it on their Facebook Wall. This will place them under protection of copyright laws.)

Another similar post:

By the present communiqué, I notify Facebook that is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute, disseminate, or take any other action against me on the basis of this profile and/or its contents. The aforementioned prohibited actions also apply to employees, students, agents and/or any staff under Facebook’s direction or control. The content of this profile is private and confidential information. The violation of my privacy is punished by law (UCC 1 1-308-308 1-103 and the Rome Statute).

Facebook is now an open capital entity. All members are recommended to publish a notice like this, or if you prefer, you may copy and paste this version. If you do not publish a statement at least once, you will be tacitly allowing the use of elements such as your photos as well as the information contained in your profile status updated….

Another…

Facebook is now a publicly traded entity. Unless you state otherwise, anyone can infringe on your right to privacy once you post to this site. It is recommended that you and other members post a similar notice as this, or you may copy and paste this version. If you do not post such a statement once, then you are indirectly allowing public use of items such as your photos and the information contained in your status updates.

PRIVACY NOTICE: Warning - any person and/or institution and/or Agent and/or Agency of any governmental structure including but not limited to the United States Federal Government also using or monitoring/using this website or any of its associated websites, you do NOT have my permission to utilize any of my profile information nor any of the content contained herein including, but not limited to my photos, and/or the comments made about my photos or any other "picture" art posted on my profile.

You are hereby notified that you are strictly prohibited from disclosing, copying, distributing, disseminating, or taking any other action against me with regard to this profile and the contents herein. The foregoing prohibitions also apply to your employee, agent, student or any personnel under your direction or control.

The contents of this profile are private and legally privileged and confidential information, and the violation of my personal privacy is punishable by law. UCC 1-103 1-308 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED WITHOUT PREJUDICE. (M)

Somewhere the huge BS alarms are going off and only the dead cannot hear them.

Okay, so why are these posts meaningless? Look to your Facebook Terms of Service (ToS). https://www.facebook.com/policies. By posting to Facebook you DO NOT lose your copyright; your copyright is automatically attached to any pictures, videos, and any intellectual property you post. This is what the Berne (not Berner as some posts refer to it) Convention of 1887, affords you.

In citing the UCC (Uniform Commercial Code), you are positing you are entering a transactional contract with Facebook; providing something of value in exchange for cash, in-kind, or some form of consideration. WRONG! The UCC governs the exchange of chattel (anything other than Real property) property between a seller(s) and a buyer(s). The UCC does not govern anything between you and Facebook unless you PURCHASE Facebook credits.

“Open Capital Entity” or “Publicly Traded Entity”. Regardless of a company’s change from privately held to selling stock has no bearing on ToS.

Now think about this. If you sign a legal document and later wish to change a substantive part, you cannot merely write an addendum and paperclip it to the original document. Do you think that writing statements such as these, alters Facebook’s ToS or provides you greater Rights? Do you think typing or pasting useless words will retroactively negate any legal agreement you have voluntarily entered?

What can you do? First, please never repost anything that you read, see, or hear on the internet without first vetting this with other primary sources. Some legitimate sources are listed below. Second, if you are in doubt, don’t post.

Finally, do I need to even address “Straight Ticket”/”Straight Party” Voters, President Obama’s Executive Orders total, placing paper on the rear window to carjack, anything about Miley Cyrus, and the worst of all, “See who has been looking at your Facebook Account”.

Okay, gotta dash. I am on a Top Secret, Black-Op Space Shuttle mission taking the fight to all the Grays and Reptilians. SHOTGUN! Called it!

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